Sussex district named a top global travel destination and loved by A-listers is actually deathly dull - and the neighbouring commuter town is filthy. Here's my insider guide to where to go instead: SALLY BROCKWAY

I’ve lived in Greater London for most of my adult life, but Sussex, my birthplace, will always have my heart. Even so, loving a county is a lot like loving your family.

Some you adore, and others, like the dodgy uncle you try to avoid at weddings and the wayward cousin nobody likes to talk about, let the side down. And yes, I’m looking at you, Chichester and Brighton .

When I grew up in Sussex, it was inhabited by locals, artists and the occasional celebrity. Now? It’s heaving with DFLs (Down From London) chasing clean air and a bigger garden.

I get it. I’ve done it myself. But here’s the truth no glossy supplement will tell you: once you’ve lived in or near the British capital, with its culture, well-read neighbours and sourdough on every corner, ending up in a soulless Sussex commuter town can feel less 'fresh start' and more 'what have I done?'

Every year, it’s the same spots on the ‘Best Places to Live’ lists. Brighton. Haywards Heath. Worthing. Crowborough. And now, Chichester has been named one of the world’s top travel destinations.

But every year, I wonder if they’re recycling copy written in 1998. Yes, the air is cleaner. Yes, the houses are (sometimes) cheaper. But high streets? Culture? Soul?

If some of these towns were a person, they’d be an accountant called Kevin. Pleasant. Competent. Beige.

I moved to Eastbourne last summer and, having grown up here and explored every inch of Sussex, here’s my brutally honest guide to the desirable, the charming and the deeply disappointing spots.

Because beaches and countryside don’t always turn a place into somewhere you’d actually want to live, or even stay in, for any length of time...

Sally Brockway (pictured) told the Daily Mail:'I’ve lived in Greater London for most of my adult life, but Sussex, my birthplace, will always have my heart. Even so, loving a county is a lot like loving your family.'

Chichester Cathedral viewed from the beautiful Bishops Palace Gardens in the historic cathedral city of Chichester in West Sussex

Chichester is chock-full of churches as it was once divided into nine medieval parishes, and boasts a magnificent cathedral.

So, if stained-glass windows and engravings are your thing, fill your boots. If you crave excitement, give it a miss because the place is about as edgy as a doily.

On paper, the district ticks all the boxes - unspoilt sandy beaches at West Wittering, Roman roots, a flagship theatre and thriving art scene. In reality, it’s bitterly disappointing.

It’s like that Hinge date that looks perfect on paper - great teeth, impressive credentials and a healthy bank balance, but when you finally meet… there’s just no chemistry, and you realise you’d have more fun doing your tax return.

There’s a dearth of decent places to eat in Chichester itself; unless you like chains, there’s no nightlife to speak of and public transport is unreliable.

And don’t be fooled by the district’s good looks because crime rates in certain areas are high. So too is anti-social behaviour. It’s a curious mix of raised eyebrows and middle fingers.

Kate Winslet has a place nearby, and Keith Richards goes to council meetings, but that’s about as rock ‘n’ roll as it gets.

Chichester has just been named one of the world’s top ten fastest-growing tourism spots according to Unpack 27 Report, but you’d do better getting your theatre fix in Brighton or Eastbourne and visiting Lewes for charm and lovely independent shops.

While Brighton is only an hour from London, Sally noted: 'There's always an excuse for why the trains are delayed/cancelled. Leaf on the line. Signalling failure. Driver having a day off' (Pictured: a stock image of Brighton)

Brighton is where liberal Londoners go when they've had enough of the capital but can't quite let go of oat milk and identity politics.

And parts of it are still fabulous - the Regency architecture that's been the backdrop for dozens of period dramas, the Lanes with its quirky independent shops, and more bakeries per person than a place really needs. What's not to love? But look closer - it's filthy.

Takeaway cartons line the pavements, beer bottles decorate the beach, and burst bin bags spill out onto streets like a permanent installation called 'Urban Decay'. Foxes and seagulls are thriving. Humans? Less so.

And the nightlife? If you enjoy vibrating molars from club bass and dodging stag dos mid-vomit, you'll thrive.

It's not car-friendly either - traffic is often gridlocked, parking is a blood sport, and using RingGo feels like a mugging.

Yes, it's an hour to London, in theory. But in practice? There's always an excuse for why the trains are delayed/cancelled. Leaf on the line. Signalling failure. Driver having a day off.

The sea air won't feel so good when the daily commute destroys you.

And it's always windy. It's so bad, you might find yourself wearing a Dryrobe 24/7, but don't worry, it's not as naff as wearing one in Kensington Gardens.

I hate to slate my birthplace, but the Brighton I loved no longer exists.

Sally said: 'Worthing has all of Brighton's problems, such as grime, parking misery, fraying edges, but with fewer redeeming features' (stock image of Worthing)

Are Sussex¿s so-called "best towns" overrated, and what makes a place truly great to live in?

Worthing has all of Brighton's problems, such as grime, parking misery, fraying edges, but with fewer redeeming features.

The town centre is shabby and not in a chic way, and some of the outer areas are downright bleak.

There's not much in the way of nightlife unless you're into real ale or karaoke. If you want edgy, stay home and watch Britain's Got Talent.

Yes, there are some perks. Perch on the Pier is genuinely lovely, and Tern upstairs is excellent with views to die for. Plus, Worthing seafront has its moments - when the sun's out, it looks and feels so much better.

But crime and anti-social behaviour are real issues. In Brighton, it's drunk stags you'll encounter, whereas in Worthing, it's gangs of roaming teenagers looking for trouble.

On the upside, there are so many lovely green spaces such as Beach House Park, Highdown Gardens, and Worthing has three railway stations, which is fortunate, because you'll want to get the hell out of there, fast.

Wander around Lewes (pictured, stock image), and you'll find magical hidden alleys, delightful cafes and houses that wouldn't look out of place in a Richard Curtis film. However, Sally warned that the property prices are high here

I did my A-levels in Lewes and would happily live there - all it lacks for me is the sea. Trains to London are good, and it oozes charm.

In parts, it's like stepping back in time - it has a fifteenth-century bookshop that's all low ceilings and creaky floors, a medieval castle that sits atop the town and Anne of Cleves's medieval house, which was a gift from Henry VIII.